Eventually
by PeaceLoveFreedom
Summary: "Rach you don't always mess things up. If you didn't you wouldn't be Rachel Berry the drama queen, the gold star that's always right next to your name. You would be Rachel Berry the normal one that didn't get on everyone's nerves for not caring enough."


**Hey guys so this is set right after regionals. It's a little late to be writing a story about it, but I really wanted to write one about Rachel and her feelings about it. So it might be a different take on how I felt Rachel felt after. So here it is I hope you like it!**

**Enjoy**

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><p>Rachel's P.O.V<p>

We had won regionals and now, we were headed for New York City to go to nationals. I was ecstatic I can't really tell you any different feeling, but something was missing. I had just sung my heart out on that stage. We had won. We were going to New York City. Everyone loved us. So what was missing? Why was I suddenly effulged in a blanket of loneliness while New Directions screamed and hugged everyone, because honestly there was no way I could have been lonely around all these people? Somehow, thought, I was.

Then I saw Finn and I knew why. He caught my gaze but I quickly looked away. He would not see me like this after we had just won. He could not know that I cared the slightest much more about him then New York City. He just couldn't, because he would never understand it. I had been in love with him since the first time I saw him. I had tried numerous times to try to get him to see that I was better than Quinn Fabray was. How impossible that task showed itself to be.

I could never hold the amount of attention she gets for a millisecond. Quinn Fabray is stunning no, she was devastatingly gorgeous. Quinn Fabray is a Cheerio. Quinn Fabray has blonde beautiful hair and hazel eyes. Quinn Fabray has a beautiful nose. Quinn Fabray has all the boys she could ever want bowing at her feet. Quinn Fabray is as close to perfect as anyone could get.

How was I supposed to match that? I would never hold the amount of beauty she did. I would never be a Cheerio. I would never have such a beautiful nose, and I would never be able to have Finn. He is wrapped around her little finger. Twisted so tightly that he cannot see or even remember what she was and had done to him.

If I remember correctly, she got pregnant with Puck, his best friend. She had lied to him and said he was the father and that he had to get a job for her and the baby. She had lied to him. Now, she was just using him for the popularity, for the label. She knew she could regain her spot on top even faster if she had Finn to go along with her plan, and it had worked.

"Rachel," a voice quietly called.

I turned around and saw Finn standing there. He looked confused and when I looked around, I saw that everyone was gone and it was just him and me standing in the big lonely room. I looked away from him and out into the audience where people should have been sitting.

"I'm going," I said as I brushed passed him, but he caught my wrists.

"Why aren't you happy Rachel? This is your dream. We are going to New York. I mean we won! Why are you acting like this?"

"You really don't know?"

"No Rach I don't get it."

"You're so clueless! We won but do you even know why I wrote that song what it was about? Do you even care? I wrote it about my whole damn high school life. I wrote it because I never did everything right. I always messed up. Especially with you Finn! I never meant to hurt you. I just wanted you to know how it felt for me. I was so in love with you!"

He looked at me his eyes betraying the calmness he was trying to show. He was not angry, or sad , or even confused he looked more disappointed than anything.

"Rach you don't always mess things up. If you didn't you wouldn't be Rachel Berry the drama queen, the gold star that's always right next to your name. You would be Rachel Berry the normal one that didn't get on everyone's nerves for not caring enough about what we were doing. You don't mess it up. You just care too much. Yeah, it is annoying after a while, but you do not give up on it. You just wanted us to be the best. Everyone does things that other people don't exactly like, its part of being human."

We both stood in silence for what felt like hours until I finally turned around and started walking away. I suddenly stopped though and turned.

"Thanks Finn. You never stopped believing in me and I don't know why."

I turned back around and started walking towards the doors leaving Finn on the stage. When I pushed through the doors of the auditorium to walk outside and saw everyone still hugging each other and tears of happiness stream down some of their faces I smiled.

"Rachel! Your song was amazing," Quinn said slightly embarrassed," I'm sorry I yelled at you in the auditorium the other day."

"You know Quinn? I am glad you did. I would have never had the strength to write the song if you hadn't taken it out of me so thank you."

She slightly smiled and walked onto the bus along with the crowd of happiness. I was about to walk onto the bus when Mr. Shuester stopped me and proudly said," your song was amazing Rachel I am so, so proud of you."

"Thank you Mr. Shue," I smiled and hugged him.

I continued onto the bus and slapped Brittany's outstretched hand as I walked down the aisle. I took my seat next to Mercedes as I saw Finn get on with a slight smile tugging at his lips as I mouthed 'thank you' to him I knew eventually everything would get better. I just had to wait.

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><p><strong>I would reallly appreciate review! So Please Please Please! Review<strong>

**Hope you enjoyed it **


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